Wanted to make a video today – didn’t work out. Sorry.

My parents decided to become asexuals . I know it’s impossible by definition – you don’t choose who you are attracted to ergo you don’t choose your sexual orientation. But you can force yourself to behave in a certain way. People do it all the time – we don’t sleep with anyone we’re attracted to just the ones we select. And we can of course force ourselves to perform sex acts that leave us cold. Since we moved out of the capital and into my dad’s hometown – which was about 20 years ago – my parents’ sex live died. And since they don’t need it they can’t understand anybody who does need to have her own sex life.
They think I’m weird for masturbating and buying sex toys. I can live with that. My mother is a bit more sympathetic – sometimes she chastises my sister when the little shit calls me whore for doing it. My sister is a typical emo Twihard. She doesn’t have a boyfriend because she is too much of an introvert (sounds familiar? ;)) to get one. But she won’t masturbate either because she says it’s unnatural. What’s natural for her is expressing her sexual frustration by physically and emotionally hurting us. She’s 20 and she still hits her older sister in order to feel better. Who’s the sick one?
While masturbation when done in private is almost OK in my home, capturing it and sharing videos on the net is not. They think it’s freaky, unnatural and I should go to a psychiatrist if I want to do such things. They can’t understand that it’s safest and easiest way for me to be sexual with other people. They would be totally OK if I found a boyfriend and fucked him six ways till Sunday. Mildly OK if it was a girlfriend. But exploring on my own, for my own sake and pleasure, without the benefit of a relationship and then sharing it? It sounds too much like sexual freedom.
So no video today. I’ve got about 5 minutes of good footage. I could post it but then I would give away all my ideas for a longer video. So I’m going to keep my secrets and wait for a time when I’ll get some privacy.